Well, that wasn’t fun

There are a lot of good reasons that a common habit we human-type people seem to have is to focus a lot, sometimes too much, on the less than wonderful events that occur in our lives.  Good reasons notwithstanding, when that becomes the prominent feature of the way that we do business, it can become quite unhelpful, even detrimental to our well-being. 

In a previous blog, we learned about the remarkable effects of simply looking for things to be grateful for can have for us.  Here is another strategy that can help us to take a broader perspective about the events of our day to day lives which can also have a positive effect.  It helps us to identify possibly positive outcomes to negative events, notice what is going well in our lives, and why.

This comes to us from Dr. Jennifer Sweeton, PsyD and it’s called the 4-3’s.  And it goes something like this….

Pro Tip:  This technique isn’t best used for dealing with genuinely traumatic or highly distressing events.

Step 1:  List out 3 things that happened in your own life today that weren’t very ideal.

Step 2:  For each of those things, write out 3 positive or neutral aspects or outcomes.

Step 3:  Now, list 3 positive things or events that happened in your life today.

Step 4: Finally, for each of those positive things, list 3 ways you contributed to them. 

This can be really helpful in our overall outlook and general mood when practiced daily; typically before bed to process the day and put things into a better perspective.  People of faith may find it useful to incorporate the practice into prayer or meditation. 

Let me encourage you to give this a try and notice any positive effects you may experience.  If you learn more about this strategy or more like it, contact me at www.tlcinva.com.